For the person who is dealing daily with anger problems, it is important to learn skills that will be effective in coping. Below I will cover three skills that may help in this cause. Not all strategies work for all people, so it is necessary to try until you find one that works for you.
*Acupressure. Tapping or rubbing the body achieves this technique. Briskly massaging your body when feeling tense and upset causes an individual’s energy to move around their body, which results in relaxation. It is very difficult to remain angry when your body is relaxed.
* Keep a journal. When an individual writes about the situations that upset them, it helps to get the negative thoughts and emotions out of their head. By journaling about feelings and emotions, a person is able to rid their minds of unhealthy thinking and put them on paper. Keep track of what caused the anger, how your body reacted and what you did. You might further cover alternative ways you could have dealt with the situation. Next time try using the alternative method.
*Remove yourself from the situation.. If a person realizes they have difficulties controlling their temper, they might consider staying away from situations that may cause heated arguments. If a person has a regular pattern of lashing out during specific situations, avoiding the situation altogether should work. Some situations and people just tend to get you going. Avoiding them if at all possible takes away the negative emotion that comes with it.
There are so many methods available for learning to control excessive anger. A person who recognizes they have such a problem can choose from so many there is bound to be at least one method that fits their personality. In the long run, taking this time, making this effort, will result in a much happier life for all involved.
Intuition is something we all have. It is that small feeling inside that so often leads us to the correct choice. Below are ways to help you learn to hear yours:
* Hypnosis – Perform self-hypnosis or you can avail of hypnotic programs that can strengthen your intuition.
*Meditation – Meditating means finding peace within. If your mind and heart are cluttered with a lot of baggage, you won’t be able to quiet down that part of you that can initiate intuition. There are so many ways to meditate: take a yoga class, or just simply practice some breathing that could bring you straight to Zen.
* Think positive – By staying positive, you attract good energy that would be able to easily recognize imminent feelings and events.
*Just let go – Let go of all your inhibitions and head to a quiet place where you can find out where the letting go has brought you. Sometimes you just have to listen to the voice within you, and that voice wouldn’t come out unless you let go.
*Never expect – After letting go of your inhibitions and all those little things that prevent you from thinking and feeling clearly, by no means expect an answer right away. Give it a little time.
*Trust your first impressions. – When you see someone for the first time and think that he is a bit too arrogant for your taste, chances are that impression actually holds true. Most of the time, first impressions are brought by intuition.
Intuition is helpful, because every now and then it leads you to something that cannot be achieved otherwise. A lot of lives have been saved by intuition alone. Decisions are easier made if armed by this gift. Expand your intuition now and harvest benefits you have never imagined.
First of all, in the light of creative problem solving, you must be open-minded to the fact that there may be more than one solution to the problem. And, you must be open to the fact that there may be solutions to problems you thought were unsolvable.
Try to understand the problem and have a solid understanding of it. If you know how it works, then you have a better foundation towards solving the problem.
Try to take note of all of the constraints and assumptions you have. Sometimes it is these assumptions that impede our view of possible solutions. You have to identify which assumptions are valid, in which assumptions need to be addressed.
Keep a creative, logical voice at the back of your head. When someone comes up with a prospective solution, try to think how you might make that solution work. Try to be creative. At the same time, look for chinks in the armor of that resolution.
It pays to remember that there may be more than just one solution being developed at one time. Try to keep track of all the solutions and their developments. Remember, there may be more than just one solution to the problem.
Always be open to new ideas. It can only be to your advantage to listen to all the ideas each person has. This is particularly correct when the person you are talking to has had experience solving problems comparable to yours. You don’t have to be a gung-ho, solo hero to solve the problem. If you can arrange group reflection on the subject, it would be much better.
Be patient. As long as you keep at it, there is always a probability that a solution will present itself. Remember that no one was able to create an invention the first time around.
*DISTINGUISH FACTS FROM FICTION.
When we disagree with someone, we frequently get worked up over not just the incident that happened, but the judgments we made about the situation and the person, the feelings that were evoked in us and the story we make up about what it all means. Take ownership for your own feelings. The other person didn’t “make you feel” a particular way. They did what they did. You chose to feel the way you did.
*DISTINGUISH MOTIVE AND EMOTIONS
We often assume we know what the other person was intending to do ‘to us’. The only thing we really know is the reaction we had to the other person’s behavior. Recognize that they may not have ‘meant’ to disrespect (or hurt, or ignore or control) you. Also recognize that if you are the perpetrator, just because your motive was innocent, that doesn’t negate the feelings the other person experienced.
*CONVERT COMPLAINTS TO REQUESTS
Imagine that any complaint (yours or another’s) is really a request in disguise. Next time you catch yourself complaining, stop then ask for it! Make the request to someone who has the power to grant it. Complaining or making requests to anyone else won’t get your problem solved.
*START WHERE YOU ARE
Open the dialog with “I’d like to say something, but I’m afraid that I’ll… or you’ll…” You’ll be surprised at the impact that sharing your vulnerability will have on the receptivity of the other person. You’ll also be surprised at how easily the important message will now come out.
*TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR CONTRIBUTION, ROLE OR INFLUENCE.
Recognize that you may have something to do with the continued existence of the problem. Figure out what actions you can take to solve your own dilemma.
*FORGIVE AND GIVE YOURSELF A GIFT.
Forgiveness is not condoning or even accepting. Forgiving someone in your heart who has ‘wronged’ you, just releases your agony. It does nothing for them.
Society is defined as a web of associations, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested, can make society work better. In this way every member works for the good of the whole. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships.
The easiest way to appreciate what is significant to another party is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. Effective relationships require parties to openly convey their feelings and positions on all matters important to the relationship.
In order to build a more effective relationship, parties must treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying genuinely to comprehend how they function. This also means respecting yourself.
One more key area in forming an effective relationship is to tackle differences of the other party openly. Work towards a win-win solution for both parties. Developing an atmosphere where the other party can express their feelings when they need to.
Parties should be aware that certain things exist naturally but should be controlled in any dealings in any relationship. Human nature is one. Some of these things found in a relationship also include a history of stereotyping or mistrust, blaming the other person or party for a strained relationship, excluding the other party’s feelings when focusing on a task, no clear and defined objectives, roles and expectations of each party in a relationship is also unclear.
Relationships are important to anyone, addressing issues and problems right away is a must to further improve the relationship. As they say ‘No man is an Island’. Working together works for the whole – and that is what is most important.
Contrary to what most people believe, leadership is not about power. It is not about harassing people or driving them using fear. It is about encouraging others towards the goal of the organization. It is putting everyone on the same page and helping him or her see the big picture of the organization. You must be a leader not a boss.
People follow others when they see a clear sense of purpose. People will only follow you if they see that you know where you are going. If you yourself do not know where you’re headed to, chances are people will not follow you.
Being a leader is not about what you make others do. It’s about who you are, what you know, and what you do. You are a reflection of what you’re subordinates must be.
Studies have shown that one other bases of good leadership are the trust and confidence your subordinates have of you. Trust and confidence is built on good relationships, trustworthiness, and high ethics.
Once you have their trust and confidence, you may now proceed to communicate the goals and objectives you are to undertake.
Communication is a very important key to good leadership. The knowledge and technical expertise you have must be clearly imparted to other people. You must be able to assess situations, weigh the pros and cons of any decision, and actively seek out a solution.
Leaders are not do-it-all heroes. You should not claim to know everything, and you should not rely upon your skills alone. You should recognize the skills and talents your subordinates have. Only when you come to this realization will you be able to work as one cohesive unit.
Remember being a leader takes a good deal of work and time. It is not learned overnight.
So how do you keep up your self-esteem in a hard-hitting atmosphere? It seems like everywhere you turn. The best way is to know the kinds of people and situations that will bring you down and thwart your efforts to stay focused. Here we will focus on some of these people and situations you need to avoid if possible.
* Negative Work Environment – Beware of the “dog eat dog” theory where each person is fighting just to get ahead. Competition is everyplace. Make sure it is a fair competition.
* Other People’s Behavior – gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders… all these kinds of people will create awful feelings for you
* Changing Environment – Changes challenge our paradigms. Change will be there forever you can’t avoid this one, but can learn to deal with it.
* Past Experience – Don’t let pain change into fear. Treat each failure and mistake as a lesson.
* Negative World View – Don’t wrap yourself up with all the negativities of the world. In building self-esteem, we must learn how to make the best out of worst situations.
* Identity – You have your own identity. If your parent is a failure, it doesn’t signify you have to be a failure as well. Learn from other people’s experience, so you’ll never have to encounter the same mistakes.
You can’t always avoid or even change a situation. And you certainly aren’t going to have much luck changing a person. You can, however, learn how to avoid such situations and people and deal effectively with those you can’t avoid.
Just putting the above advice into action in your life, you will see your self-esteem grab hold and start to climb. Before long, you will instinctively begin to know when a situation is bad for your self-esteem.
Anger is an emotion experienced by everyone. Nevertheless anger can be considered too intense. Anger can be an awfully destructive emotion if it isn’t controlled. Controlling anger is considered anger management. It is essential to manage your anger so it does not become harmful either to yourself or others.
The initial step to controlling anger issues it to acknowledge there is a problem. If a person continues down a course where they are always angry and acting out, it will ultimately cause major problems. Lacking anger management this person will likely experience loss of their family, loss of their job and loss of their own identity.
Anger management is not intended to be a chastisement but rather to assist a person to have a better quality of life. Anger management is intended to assist the individual work out their problems, help them figure out why they become so heated. It also teaches the person not to be imprisoned by their emotions, their anger. Anger management is meant to educate the person in techniques that prevent them from getting angry as often or for very long.
There are programs formed expressly to assist those with anger issues. These programs are broken down to deal with different people – kids, teens, adults, couples and families. These anger management programs are in place to teach or assist people to work on their anger. Educating people on strategies for working out their problems and controlling their anger are important in anger management.
Anger may be a healthy, common emotion but when the anger takes over an individual’s life making them destructive and aggressive, it’s a big problem. Not only does the anger destroy the person but it also impacts everybody and everything around him or her. Anger management can change this individual and guarantee a healthy, normal life.
Anger management plans are developed to offer a person a plan of action when a stressful or confrontational situation arises. When the individual experiences signs of negative emotions and angry thoughts, an anger management lesson plan is meant to provide tools to decrease or control their temper. Anger management lesson plans can be designed to be individual, once a person finds techniques or adopts skills that work for them.
Becoming conscious of what makes you angry is the first step. Writing down these thoughts might help you to decide how to proceed in a positive way rather than lash out.
The second step necessary is to practice self-control. When opposition arises it is essential to stop, take a minute and think the situation through. This gives you an opportunity to think about your usual response without actually acting on it.
After you think about your probable reaction, it is then essential to think about the potential fallout from each reaction. Thinking things through can permit you to consider reasonable ways of dealing with the situation besides becoming hot-tempered.
The fourth step in this anger management lesson is the decision making step. Considering the options for reactions, now you must decide which one that is likely to work or be effective. Of course then it’s time to act on this decision.
When you have followed through with these four steps, it is then necessary to evaluate your process. This step in the anger management lesson plan allows time to think over the entire situation to discern whether the result was a positive one.
Working through anger management plans such as this one may be easy to carry out when you are in a calm state of mind. The true test comes when these steps are put into action when you are angry and experiencing negative thoughts and emotions. The only way to ensure these anger management lesson plans work is to practice them over and over again.
Dealing with children who have anger problems is challenging and requires thought and imagination. A child’s mind is as a rule not developed sufficiently enough to deal with intense feelings such as anger. Children are not equipped to clarify their feelings. In order to create anger management programs that will help children, the individual needs to recognize how a child’s mind works, as well as what interests them and use this knowledge to develop an effective anger management program for children
Children are familiar with worksheets, coloring pages and puzzles. These kind of activities are used every day in the school setting so incorporating anger management lessons into these activities makes sense. These worksheets can be made fun and interesting. These worksheets can teach techniques and strategies for controlling anger in such a way that children will comprehend and react to. Using well-known situations in coloring pages or related words in puzzles may help a child to deal with anger issues without making the situation complicated.
Children love playing games. In addition to using worksheets, it might be helpful to include games into a children’s anger management program. Designing activities that include role-playing may help children to realize that they can not always be the center of attention. Anger management for children can be taught in all sorts of ways that will be both productive as well as enjoyable.
Listing different possibilities for their anger and having them read over them to see which statements apply to them might be beneficial in treating kids with anger issues. Simple sentences, using everyday dilemmas that a child may encounter could be used in these anger management worksheets. Children may not even realize the reason for these worksheets yet they may be providing relevant information that can help in treatment of the problem..